Don’t Rely on Just Pheromones

Posted On Wednesday, April 19th, 2017 By Sam

There are beers to drink and women to meet!” The head out the door, his roommate’s spirits already lifted because he boosted his pheromones. If she is doing any of these, continue to move forward by showing a little interest through qualification. Learn more about pheromones at and

The ice has been broken and she is now ready for the conversation to get real. If however, you are not seeing any of the above, you can use our tried and true safe exit. It looks something like this: With a big smile, let the group know that it was “Awesome meeting you guys but I have to get back to my friends. Have a great night!” This works because no matter how poorly it went, you can leave on a positive note on true pheromones, and your smile will let the other people in the room know that things are all right. You never want to get reactive and make a negative comment no matter how negative someone may have received your approach. Learn more at

These are the moments that keep the night going and getting negative is a sure sign that the night will not be going your way. Your body is always saying something, whether you’re aware of it or not. Banter is not only verbal, but physical too. It’s not just what you say, but also how you hold your body while saying it. Women are experts at reading body language. It takes place subconsciously, on a very visceral level. Even the most clever banter line will fail if your body language is off. This is why we need to stick to the approach fundamentals from earlier in the book and make sure we always smile when we deliver any banter line. Don’t rely on just human pheromones. It’s about more than just your smile and posture. It’s also about the way you position your body compared to hers. What do I mean? Well, in order to banter successfully, you need to shift between what I call positive and negative body language. • Positive Body Language: The angle in which you are facing towards someone. For example, when you face a woman directly, face to face, you are giving her “fully positive body language.” • Neutral Body Language: When you are standing directly side by side with the person you are interacting with. This position is most comfortable for both of you because you can easily hear each other and stand close enough that you can touch without reaching. The angle in which you are angled away from someone. Turning your back on someone, for example, would be considered “fully negative body language.” When bantering, I don’t recommend fully positive or fully negative body language. The former should be used sparingly because too much face-to-face, direct interaction at this early stage can make the other person feel awkward and anxious. The latter, turning your back on someone, is just downright rude. You should always try to carry almost all of your interactions from the neutral position with a sprinkling of positive and negative body language to move things forward, and to get her to chase after your attention a bit. Thus, when I say “give positive body language,” I just mean “angle more towards the person,” and when I say, “give negative body language,” try and turn slightly away from the person you are speaking with.

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